So today the husband, the kid, and I went down stateside to hang out and do a bit of shopping. Before we started our shopping marathon, we decided to stop for lunch at Taco Time. Through a miscommunication, we wound up getting two extra tacos that none of us ended up having. We saved the tacos, figuring we could eat it later, or better yet, give it to someone who's hungry.
We went shopping at Ross for an hour or so, and then on our way back to the car, I notice a guy sitting in the parking lot under the blazing hot sun. I've seen him there before, and I've given him food each time I've seen him, since we always seem to have leftovers from some restaurant or another. Today was no exception.
Here's the crazy part: When I gave him the food, his reaction was, "Are you sure you can afford this? Thank you! Are you sure?" This guy, a Navy vet (according to his sign), is hungry, homeless, sitting under the blazing sun, and his primary concern was making sure *I* wasn't going to go hungry or put myself out by giving him this food. Let's be real here - if I didn't give this guy our food, I was going to turf it. And this guy was worried... for *me*. After I just spent $70 on clothes that I didn't *really* need. I was so moved I started to cry.
We often forget how incredibly rich we are. We take our three squares a day, our overabundance of snacks, our drinks at the bar, all of that stuff for granted. We gorge ourselves on Ben and Jerry's and then complain... we complain about how full we are! We whine about being fat. We joke about how this bottle of wine is going to cost us a couple of hours at the gym. Then when some person who's obviously living on the streets has the temerity to ask us for the spare change in our pockets so they can get something to eat, we lie that we don't have any. Or that we can't spare any.
This is a lie. Most of us probably don't have the resources to do what FouseyTube, MagicofRahat, or Sofia's Angels do. But that doesn't mean we can't do something.
I'm going to try to do something.
(PS: Sorry if the post ended somewhat abruptly. It started to sound a bit preachy. I didn't like that, and it's late. So I ended it where I did.)
Showing posts with label community. Show all posts
Showing posts with label community. Show all posts
Sunday, August 3, 2014
Monday, July 15, 2013
White Privilege
The evening of the George Zimmerman not guilty (*cough*bullspit*cough*) verdict was passed down, I saw this status on Facebook.
This is the reality of 2013 - still. And the thing is, this isn't something we can claim is an American problem. This is as much an issue in Canada, and the people who get the crap end of the stick in the want of racial equality are First Nations. One really solid indicator of this is the prison population.
In Canada, aboriginals make up about four per cent of the general Canadian population, yet make up 23 per cent of the prison population. Racial over-representation in the prison system is equally as horrid in the United States. According to the US Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) non-Hispanic blacks accounted for 39.4% of the total prison and jail population in 2009. According to the 2010 census of the US Census Bureau blacks (including Hispanic blacks) comprised 13.6% of the US population. In this infographic you can see how the system is really built to favour the white population in the US and while there isn't a well laid out (if poorly proof-read) infographic to show it, the same is true for the Canadian penal system.
For years, I've been really guilty of thinking, "well, I'm not a racist. I value all races equally so this racism thing everyone talks about is a problem, but it's not a problem in my life." Sure, I'd get upset when I see evidence/footage of inequality but by and large, I was indifferent to it. Not with any malice aforethought, I just was. I think an overwhelming, well-meaning majority of us have been/are. It seems like such a huge issue, while at the same time, such an old issue. I mean, Martin Luther King Jr. gave that epic speech, and the States has a black president who's serving his second term, right? What's left to be done?
There's a lot to be done. Exactly what, and how - I have no clue. I have to hope that not being blinded about being "colourblind" is at least a start. There is no post-racial America. If you still have to say "port-racism America" then it's not. Nor is that the case in Canada.
If you're still reading this (thanks!) and you come from a European background and live in North America, think about the fact that you and I have never had to encounter the same levels of racism as others have. We may have experienced moments here and there, but it's not a systemic occurrence. We haven't had to be trained not to trust police, to not speak about cultural events, or wear certain clothing.
We shouldn't feel guilty about being white, but we should be aware of this, be aware of how utterly unfair this is, and be aware that if we want equality for everyone, we need to start saying that this isn't okay. For decades, we've stood by and watched as Blacks, Natives, and Hispanics have fought for equal treatment and we've felt good about ourselves because we agreed with their point of view.
It's not enough anymore.
I haven't been able to not think about this since I read it. This is something Mini-Moo won't ever have to worry about, and that depresses me. Not because my son won't ever have to worry about wearing a hoody out in public, or worry about his name sounding too "ethnic" (*cough*bullspit*cough*) to get a job and therefore adopting an "employable" nickname (read: "White" name), or worry about being pulled over for speeding and making sure he behaves in such a way the police won't misinterpret his actions as aggressive. It depresses me because other parents have to train their kids to worry about this stuff.
This is the reality of 2013 - still. And the thing is, this isn't something we can claim is an American problem. This is as much an issue in Canada, and the people who get the crap end of the stick in the want of racial equality are First Nations. One really solid indicator of this is the prison population.
In Canada, aboriginals make up about four per cent of the general Canadian population, yet make up 23 per cent of the prison population. Racial over-representation in the prison system is equally as horrid in the United States. According to the US Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) non-Hispanic blacks accounted for 39.4% of the total prison and jail population in 2009. According to the 2010 census of the US Census Bureau blacks (including Hispanic blacks) comprised 13.6% of the US population. In this infographic you can see how the system is really built to favour the white population in the US and while there isn't a well laid out (if poorly proof-read) infographic to show it, the same is true for the Canadian penal system.
For years, I've been really guilty of thinking, "well, I'm not a racist. I value all races equally so this racism thing everyone talks about is a problem, but it's not a problem in my life." Sure, I'd get upset when I see evidence/footage of inequality but by and large, I was indifferent to it. Not with any malice aforethought, I just was. I think an overwhelming, well-meaning majority of us have been/are. It seems like such a huge issue, while at the same time, such an old issue. I mean, Martin Luther King Jr. gave that epic speech, and the States has a black president who's serving his second term, right? What's left to be done?
There's a lot to be done. Exactly what, and how - I have no clue. I have to hope that not being blinded about being "colourblind" is at least a start. There is no post-racial America. If you still have to say "port-racism America" then it's not. Nor is that the case in Canada.
If you're still reading this (thanks!) and you come from a European background and live in North America, think about the fact that you and I have never had to encounter the same levels of racism as others have. We may have experienced moments here and there, but it's not a systemic occurrence. We haven't had to be trained not to trust police, to not speak about cultural events, or wear certain clothing.
We shouldn't feel guilty about being white, but we should be aware of this, be aware of how utterly unfair this is, and be aware that if we want equality for everyone, we need to start saying that this isn't okay. For decades, we've stood by and watched as Blacks, Natives, and Hispanics have fought for equal treatment and we've felt good about ourselves because we agreed with their point of view.
It's not enough anymore.
Thursday, June 13, 2013
Road Trip Travel Tips
My family and I love traveling and between us have driven across most of Canada and America. It's been a long time since I've posted anything (sorry! It's been a hectic 5 months or so) but my partner has been amazing enough to write something for me. He's basically a young Rick Steves when it comes to traveling, so pay attention.
These days advice about how to have a good roadtrip seems to revolve around what apps you have on your phone, I would like to provide something a bit more substantial to those of you planning to hit the road...
In-car Entertainment: Don't rely on a cell phone app that may require data coverage or drain your battery, bring a broad selection of mp3s and give everyone unlimited vetos - peace and enjoyment restored reliably. Bring a video game for the kid but just one game so it can be used as needed but not be a focus for the entire trip.
Shotgun Responsibilities: The person riding shotgun should operate and interpret the GPS and provide snacks to the driver upon request, also helping out with changing music and finding sunglasses and whatnot - this makes for a safer, happier drive.
Don't Fear The Stop: Don't hate on the guy who needs a bathroom break, this is a chance to dump garbage, refuel, clean the windows, stretch your legs, resupply, etc. It's an opportunity for all or a frustration for most depending on how you look at it.
Be Flexible: Unexpected stops, missed exits, and things spotted along the way can lead to great discoveries and experiences - keep your itinerary flexible and don't fall in love with an idea to the exclusion of others.
Be Prepared: Don't plan every meal but bring information on major restaurants near every hotel stay. Provide everyone options and give everyone a chance to express their opinion. Superior information makes for a superior experience.
If you want more posts like this, or more posts "ghost written" by my partner, please comment on this post and I will accommodate as best as I can.
Over the next week or so I will have some more content on here as the Mario Marathon is starting again on June 21st. My donation widget is on the right; it would be awesome if you could donate. Those of you who know me and my blog know that I'm a huge supporter of Mario Marathon and Child's Play Charity. Those of you who aren't familiar with me and my blog, there are a number of posts explaining what both are all about and why I go on and on about them. The labels associated with this post will direct you to those posts.
See you all soon!
These days advice about how to have a good roadtrip seems to revolve around what apps you have on your phone, I would like to provide something a bit more substantial to those of you planning to hit the road...
In-car Entertainment: Don't rely on a cell phone app that may require data coverage or drain your battery, bring a broad selection of mp3s and give everyone unlimited vetos - peace and enjoyment restored reliably. Bring a video game for the kid but just one game so it can be used as needed but not be a focus for the entire trip.
Shotgun Responsibilities: The person riding shotgun should operate and interpret the GPS and provide snacks to the driver upon request, also helping out with changing music and finding sunglasses and whatnot - this makes for a safer, happier drive.
Don't Fear The Stop: Don't hate on the guy who needs a bathroom break, this is a chance to dump garbage, refuel, clean the windows, stretch your legs, resupply, etc. It's an opportunity for all or a frustration for most depending on how you look at it.
Be Flexible: Unexpected stops, missed exits, and things spotted along the way can lead to great discoveries and experiences - keep your itinerary flexible and don't fall in love with an idea to the exclusion of others.
Be Prepared: Don't plan every meal but bring information on major restaurants near every hotel stay. Provide everyone options and give everyone a chance to express their opinion. Superior information makes for a superior experience.
If you want more posts like this, or more posts "ghost written" by my partner, please comment on this post and I will accommodate as best as I can.
Over the next week or so I will have some more content on here as the Mario Marathon is starting again on June 21st. My donation widget is on the right; it would be awesome if you could donate. Those of you who know me and my blog know that I'm a huge supporter of Mario Marathon and Child's Play Charity. Those of you who aren't familiar with me and my blog, there are a number of posts explaining what both are all about and why I go on and on about them. The labels associated with this post will direct you to those posts.
See you all soon!
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Parenting in a Social Media Age
This
article is long overdue!
Last summer, I said that I would write a blog post of whatever topic (provided it didn't promote hate in any way) to whoever would make the highest bid to the Mario Marathon through my blog within a certain time frame. Someone I got to know through the marathon and Twitter won the bid, but I have been exceedingly and embarrassingly negligent in my payout. My apologies!
The topic requested is, as the post title says, about parenting in a social media age. There are plenty of ways to approach this topic and as a parent I do have a vested interest in topics such as these, especially as my kid gets older and as parents, my partner and I have to start thinking about how we are going to approach our kid's introduction/involvement in social media.
People have plenty of opinions on when they will allow their child/ren on the internet, whether or not they will supervise their internet usage, if they should get NetNanny or something to that degree, or what have you. I'm not going to go into that tonight. I don't know that there's one right or wrong way to handle that whole can of worms; I'm pretty positive there isn't. Every child is different, I figure the way a parent should approach the topic of internet usage ought to depend on the child themselves.
What I am going to talk about it using social media as a parenting tool. Just a quick qualifier, since I really only use Facebook and Twitter as social media tools, I'm really only going to speak to those two specific social media devices. I know there's Google+, Reddit, Tumblr, StumbleUpon, et al - but I don't use them, so I can't speak to them with any great "authority". So when I say social media, it's shorthand for Facebook and Twitter, mkay?
We've all heard the saying that is takes a village to raise a child, and I really think that social media has made that more true now than it has in a really long time leading up to this. It has enabled parents to build a larger network of parents who we feel comfortable enough to lean on for advice, for a sounding board, or for someone we can commiserate with. From the excitement of announcing that you're going to have/adopt a child and going through the journey of waiting for your new family member to come home, to welcoming the child home, to praying for the day they leave, you have more than just your parents, siblings who are also parents, and Mommy-and-Me friends to lean on.
Not only is your network larger (potentially), but you wind up (potentially) getting a broader range of parenting methods that you wind up being exposed to that you may not have been introduced to before social media blew into town. How many parents these days go to Facebook when their kid has some weird sounding cough, or is having issues with potty training before they go to WebMD or a clinic? I know I have on many occasions (perhaps to the chagrin of my partner on more than one occasion), and I know I will do so in the future.
Like with any form of advice, expert or otherwise, you definitely need to take it with a grain of salt. Understand that what works for your evangelical Christian, public schooling, 3 child friend is likely to be vastly different than what works for your Sikh, Khalsa schooling, 2 child friend and either may or may not work for you, you single child, pantheistic, home schooling, crunchy parent, you. The trick is to use the suggestions given to you by your friends/colleagues/family members as more of an aid to bolster your own ideas on how to deal with your kid yanking on the cat's tail (Pro Tip: Don't do what these parents did). Don't take the advice given as gospel. Even the good advice. Especially the advice that calls itself gospel.
The thing I enjoy the most about asking for/giving parenting advice on social media is that it really helps me to feel like I'm not alone; I suspect I'm not alone in this opinion either. It really goes back to the saying I mentioned earlier about it taking a village. I like that I get to share in my parenting “aha!” moments and frustrations with my friends in Maine equally with my friends here that I actually get to see. I like that we all get to watch our children grow up together, and I like that my friends in California are almost as excited as I am when my child hits some milestone in life, even though they've never actually met my kid.
That last sentence may cause some people to worry about security, and I don't entirely blame them; it's a scary world out there, and you have to be ultra vigilant as a parent. That shouldn't prevent you from seeing social media for the valuable parenting tool it is. It's also entirely possible to keep your child 100% anonymous on the internet, while still reaping the benefits of the social village parenting. I see it being done all the time. Sure, it takes a concerted effort, but it's totally doable. You can seek advice/brag about your child without giving any pertinent details except for possibly a ballparked age and still having people rallying behind you and your child. Try a gender neutral nickname and refer to your child only by that nickname and/or gender neutral pronouns. Frankly, it's probably not a bad idea even if you're not going to go all out in making your kid the next Blanket on the internet. Your kid's accomplishments ought not be determined by what's between their legs, but that's a whole different topic that I will probably talk about at a later date.
Since I'm not going to great lengths to making my kid anonymous on the internet (not on Facebook, at any rate. Here and on Twitter is a different story) I won't try to come up with tips on how to Blanket your child/ren, but I'm sure a few well thought out keywords on a Google search will lead you to a blog somewhere that talks about exactly that. Or, if you'd prefer, ask your friends on Facebook.
Last summer, I said that I would write a blog post of whatever topic (provided it didn't promote hate in any way) to whoever would make the highest bid to the Mario Marathon through my blog within a certain time frame. Someone I got to know through the marathon and Twitter won the bid, but I have been exceedingly and embarrassingly negligent in my payout. My apologies!
The topic requested is, as the post title says, about parenting in a social media age. There are plenty of ways to approach this topic and as a parent I do have a vested interest in topics such as these, especially as my kid gets older and as parents, my partner and I have to start thinking about how we are going to approach our kid's introduction/involvement in social media.
People have plenty of opinions on when they will allow their child/ren on the internet, whether or not they will supervise their internet usage, if they should get NetNanny or something to that degree, or what have you. I'm not going to go into that tonight. I don't know that there's one right or wrong way to handle that whole can of worms; I'm pretty positive there isn't. Every child is different, I figure the way a parent should approach the topic of internet usage ought to depend on the child themselves.
What I am going to talk about it using social media as a parenting tool. Just a quick qualifier, since I really only use Facebook and Twitter as social media tools, I'm really only going to speak to those two specific social media devices. I know there's Google+, Reddit, Tumblr, StumbleUpon, et al - but I don't use them, so I can't speak to them with any great "authority". So when I say social media, it's shorthand for Facebook and Twitter, mkay?
We've all heard the saying that is takes a village to raise a child, and I really think that social media has made that more true now than it has in a really long time leading up to this. It has enabled parents to build a larger network of parents who we feel comfortable enough to lean on for advice, for a sounding board, or for someone we can commiserate with. From the excitement of announcing that you're going to have/adopt a child and going through the journey of waiting for your new family member to come home, to welcoming the child home, to praying for the day they leave, you have more than just your parents, siblings who are also parents, and Mommy-and-Me friends to lean on.
Not only is your network larger (potentially), but you wind up (potentially) getting a broader range of parenting methods that you wind up being exposed to that you may not have been introduced to before social media blew into town. How many parents these days go to Facebook when their kid has some weird sounding cough, or is having issues with potty training before they go to WebMD or a clinic? I know I have on many occasions (perhaps to the chagrin of my partner on more than one occasion), and I know I will do so in the future.
Like with any form of advice, expert or otherwise, you definitely need to take it with a grain of salt. Understand that what works for your evangelical Christian, public schooling, 3 child friend is likely to be vastly different than what works for your Sikh, Khalsa schooling, 2 child friend and either may or may not work for you, you single child, pantheistic, home schooling, crunchy parent, you. The trick is to use the suggestions given to you by your friends/colleagues/family members as more of an aid to bolster your own ideas on how to deal with your kid yanking on the cat's tail (Pro Tip: Don't do what these parents did). Don't take the advice given as gospel. Even the good advice. Especially the advice that calls itself gospel.
The thing I enjoy the most about asking for/giving parenting advice on social media is that it really helps me to feel like I'm not alone; I suspect I'm not alone in this opinion either. It really goes back to the saying I mentioned earlier about it taking a village. I like that I get to share in my parenting “aha!” moments and frustrations with my friends in Maine equally with my friends here that I actually get to see. I like that we all get to watch our children grow up together, and I like that my friends in California are almost as excited as I am when my child hits some milestone in life, even though they've never actually met my kid.
That last sentence may cause some people to worry about security, and I don't entirely blame them; it's a scary world out there, and you have to be ultra vigilant as a parent. That shouldn't prevent you from seeing social media for the valuable parenting tool it is. It's also entirely possible to keep your child 100% anonymous on the internet, while still reaping the benefits of the social village parenting. I see it being done all the time. Sure, it takes a concerted effort, but it's totally doable. You can seek advice/brag about your child without giving any pertinent details except for possibly a ballparked age and still having people rallying behind you and your child. Try a gender neutral nickname and refer to your child only by that nickname and/or gender neutral pronouns. Frankly, it's probably not a bad idea even if you're not going to go all out in making your kid the next Blanket on the internet. Your kid's accomplishments ought not be determined by what's between their legs, but that's a whole different topic that I will probably talk about at a later date.
Since I'm not going to great lengths to making my kid anonymous on the internet (not on Facebook, at any rate. Here and on Twitter is a different story) I won't try to come up with tips on how to Blanket your child/ren, but I'm sure a few well thought out keywords on a Google search will lead you to a blog somewhere that talks about exactly that. Or, if you'd prefer, ask your friends on Facebook.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
This Christmas...
This Christmas/holiday season I hereby issue a challenge:
Don't buy anything for your loved ones!
Pretty crazy, I know, but hear me out.
Today I finally got around to tackling a task I really don't like doing, which is clearing our kitchen table. It's basically a catchall for junk mail and random doodads that we don't know what to do with just yet. I avoid it as often as possible, but eventually it has to be done. Anyhow, as I was clearing out, I stumbled upon a World Vision gift catalogue. Intrigued, I put it aside while I finished my task at hand.
After finishing, I decided to thumb through the catalogue; what I saw brought me to tears. Even talking to my fiance about it 10 minutes later caused me to break down in tears, yet again. Sure, commercials can make me cry, but that's beside the point. Did you know, that for $30CAD, you can give 10 children the gift of health? For $35CAD, you can give 3 families the gift of self-reliance. Forty five dollars gives the gift of literacy, education, independence, the chance for freedom to a classroom full of children. For only $100CAD, you can give entire communities the gift of life.
So little is needed to give so much to so many people. How many of us have a wish list of things that we want for our birthdays or Christmas (or whatever gift giving celebration you participate in)? How many of us are fretting, thinking, "Oh, god! What am I going to get Mom and Dad this year?" How many of us get nauseated at the idea of having to brave yet another mall excursion to get a $50 toy for your kid, who already has a room full of toys, and who may only play with that toy a half dozen times - if even that much?
Okay yes, not actually getting anything for your kids (the ones who aren't grown, at any rate) may seem a bit harsh, but I do encourage you to think about how much you're willing to spend on everyone, and how much of an impact even a fraction of what you will spend this year will have on people who really do need our help.
How about this? Instead of not buying anyone any gifts this holiday season, consider making a donation to World Vision, or whatever organization you wish to donate to in the name of at least one person on your list. Chances are, they will be moved that someone loved them enough to save a bunch of people in their name.
PS: I have the pleasure of getting to know a person by the name of Cathy on Facebook. She has a business page called Cathy's Creations and she knows, perhaps more than most, the joy helping someone can bring. She puts a fair bit of time (I'm assuming, judging by how many packages she sends out on a weekly basis) into making beautiful bracelets (among many other things). One line of bracelets she makes are "Cause Jewelery". Proceeds from the bracelets goes to various (American) health organizations, children's charities (usually for a specific child who has to spend much of their short life fighting cancer or some other life threatening condition), or awareness efforts. She has touched many, many lives, brought joy and hope to many children and their families, and has inspired a lot of us to get off our duffs and do the same.
I've been off work for nearly 8 months now, but I'm going back soon. One of the first things I'm going to do with my first paycheque is buy a coat for the man who sits outside my local grocery store. I don't know his name, or what brought him to his current situation (though, I can't help but wonder how much he would benefit from more efforts/funding for social housing in our city) but I do know that he is kind to my son, and doesn't have a clean coat to keep him warm and dry. That's all I need to know.
I can't help but wonder if I would have been inspired to do this, had it not been for the inspiration we get from all the kind, selfless, wonderful things she does for so many people. I'm not Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Pagan or Buddhist, but truly believe that Cathy is doing something that transcends humanity.
Don't buy anything for your loved ones!
Pretty crazy, I know, but hear me out.
Today I finally got around to tackling a task I really don't like doing, which is clearing our kitchen table. It's basically a catchall for junk mail and random doodads that we don't know what to do with just yet. I avoid it as often as possible, but eventually it has to be done. Anyhow, as I was clearing out, I stumbled upon a World Vision gift catalogue. Intrigued, I put it aside while I finished my task at hand.
After finishing, I decided to thumb through the catalogue; what I saw brought me to tears. Even talking to my fiance about it 10 minutes later caused me to break down in tears, yet again. Sure, commercials can make me cry, but that's beside the point. Did you know, that for $30CAD, you can give 10 children the gift of health? For $35CAD, you can give 3 families the gift of self-reliance. Forty five dollars gives the gift of literacy, education, independence, the chance for freedom to a classroom full of children. For only $100CAD, you can give entire communities the gift of life.
So little is needed to give so much to so many people. How many of us have a wish list of things that we want for our birthdays or Christmas (or whatever gift giving celebration you participate in)? How many of us are fretting, thinking, "Oh, god! What am I going to get Mom and Dad this year?" How many of us get nauseated at the idea of having to brave yet another mall excursion to get a $50 toy for your kid, who already has a room full of toys, and who may only play with that toy a half dozen times - if even that much?
Okay yes, not actually getting anything for your kids (the ones who aren't grown, at any rate) may seem a bit harsh, but I do encourage you to think about how much you're willing to spend on everyone, and how much of an impact even a fraction of what you will spend this year will have on people who really do need our help.
How about this? Instead of not buying anyone any gifts this holiday season, consider making a donation to World Vision, or whatever organization you wish to donate to in the name of at least one person on your list. Chances are, they will be moved that someone loved them enough to save a bunch of people in their name.
PS: I have the pleasure of getting to know a person by the name of Cathy on Facebook. She has a business page called Cathy's Creations and she knows, perhaps more than most, the joy helping someone can bring. She puts a fair bit of time (I'm assuming, judging by how many packages she sends out on a weekly basis) into making beautiful bracelets (among many other things). One line of bracelets she makes are "Cause Jewelery". Proceeds from the bracelets goes to various (American) health organizations, children's charities (usually for a specific child who has to spend much of their short life fighting cancer or some other life threatening condition), or awareness efforts. She has touched many, many lives, brought joy and hope to many children and their families, and has inspired a lot of us to get off our duffs and do the same.
I've been off work for nearly 8 months now, but I'm going back soon. One of the first things I'm going to do with my first paycheque is buy a coat for the man who sits outside my local grocery store. I don't know his name, or what brought him to his current situation (though, I can't help but wonder how much he would benefit from more efforts/funding for social housing in our city) but I do know that he is kind to my son, and doesn't have a clean coat to keep him warm and dry. That's all I need to know.
I can't help but wonder if I would have been inspired to do this, had it not been for the inspiration we get from all the kind, selfless, wonderful things she does for so many people. I'm not Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Pagan or Buddhist, but truly believe that Cathy is doing something that transcends humanity.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
That's retarded.
Today, a friend of mine on Facebook shared a wonderful link to another blog. It wasn't a particularly long post, but it had an impact on me.
How many of you, like me, respond to things we disagree with,don't like, think is awful or just have a negative reaction to with, "That's retarded" or, "That's gay"? I'm very guilty of using the latter phrase.
I have a coworker of mine who is an incredibly beautiful man. He's generous (almost to a fault), funny, kind, hard working, always smiling and just plain awesome. He's also gay. For whatever reason, it never occurred to me that when I say "That's gay" that it was hurtful to him. I was using the word gay as a pejorative, and therefore saying that he is someone to think less of. Of course I don't mean or even think that. But I also wasn't thinking of what I was saying.
One day, he was telling me a story about a weird call he had taken, or some not very happy situation in his life that I was commiserating with him on and said "That's gay". He just looked at me and said, "Thanks." Nothing else. He didn't go off on me, didn't tell me off, didn't call me hurtful things, didn't react negatively in any way. That's not his style. He'd sooner gut himself than willingly hurt someone, even if it was in defense of himself. All he said was, "Thanks."
There was so much hurt in that single word. So much disappointment. So much sorrow. And I had caused it. I felt about half an inch tall and immediately apologized for saying that. There was no excuse for saying it. All I could do was beg his forgiveness. Being the amazing guy he is, he accepted my apology and we moved on. I have tried to be more cognizant of my words since then, but I can't promise that I have never used that phrase or "That's retarded" since. It's become such an entrenched part of society's (the Western society at any rate) lexicon that we literally don't know what we're saying when we say it.
Many of my friends have children who have Autism or are on the spectrum or have something in their brains/bodies that keeps them from living like "normal" kids. A lot of my friends do, in fact. Never, never would it occur to me to call them retarded. They're not (not in the way that people think of the word, at any rate - because let's face it, when you hear the word retarded, you're not thinking happy thoughts, are you? It's a sad, and frankly disgusting reality). They're some of the most beautiful kids I've had the pleasure of seeing grow up through pictures, stories and videos posted on Facebook and their respective blogs. They have some of the biggest smiles I have ever seen, and I absolutely love reading stories of them coming to grips with their situation and learning how to cope with it. When their parents struggle, or when they struggle and their parents vent online, I hurt for them. When they're over the moon because their child said "I love you." to them, I rejoice with them.
I don't know how or why "That's retarded" and "That's gay" became an accepted turn of phrase but we really need to think about who we are saying that about, and stop saying it. You wouldn't say "That's so cancerous" or "That's Chinese" as a pejorative, would you? No, because people who run you out of town for saying something like that. You'd be labeled at best insensitive or callous, and at worst a bigot or a racist. Well guess what? Every time you (and I) say "That's gay" and/or "That's retarded" that's exactly what you are. An insensitive, callous, bigot.
Let's end the use of the R word, okay?
How many of you, like me, respond to things we disagree with,don't like, think is awful or just have a negative reaction to with, "That's retarded" or, "That's gay"? I'm very guilty of using the latter phrase.
I have a coworker of mine who is an incredibly beautiful man. He's generous (almost to a fault), funny, kind, hard working, always smiling and just plain awesome. He's also gay. For whatever reason, it never occurred to me that when I say "That's gay" that it was hurtful to him. I was using the word gay as a pejorative, and therefore saying that he is someone to think less of. Of course I don't mean or even think that. But I also wasn't thinking of what I was saying.
One day, he was telling me a story about a weird call he had taken, or some not very happy situation in his life that I was commiserating with him on and said "That's gay". He just looked at me and said, "Thanks." Nothing else. He didn't go off on me, didn't tell me off, didn't call me hurtful things, didn't react negatively in any way. That's not his style. He'd sooner gut himself than willingly hurt someone, even if it was in defense of himself. All he said was, "Thanks."
There was so much hurt in that single word. So much disappointment. So much sorrow. And I had caused it. I felt about half an inch tall and immediately apologized for saying that. There was no excuse for saying it. All I could do was beg his forgiveness. Being the amazing guy he is, he accepted my apology and we moved on. I have tried to be more cognizant of my words since then, but I can't promise that I have never used that phrase or "That's retarded" since. It's become such an entrenched part of society's (the Western society at any rate) lexicon that we literally don't know what we're saying when we say it.
Many of my friends have children who have Autism or are on the spectrum or have something in their brains/bodies that keeps them from living like "normal" kids. A lot of my friends do, in fact. Never, never would it occur to me to call them retarded. They're not (not in the way that people think of the word, at any rate - because let's face it, when you hear the word retarded, you're not thinking happy thoughts, are you? It's a sad, and frankly disgusting reality). They're some of the most beautiful kids I've had the pleasure of seeing grow up through pictures, stories and videos posted on Facebook and their respective blogs. They have some of the biggest smiles I have ever seen, and I absolutely love reading stories of them coming to grips with their situation and learning how to cope with it. When their parents struggle, or when they struggle and their parents vent online, I hurt for them. When they're over the moon because their child said "I love you." to them, I rejoice with them.
I don't know how or why "That's retarded" and "That's gay" became an accepted turn of phrase but we really need to think about who we are saying that about, and stop saying it. You wouldn't say "That's so cancerous" or "That's Chinese" as a pejorative, would you? No, because people who run you out of town for saying something like that. You'd be labeled at best insensitive or callous, and at worst a bigot or a racist. Well guess what? Every time you (and I) say "That's gay" and/or "That's retarded" that's exactly what you are. An insensitive, callous, bigot.
Let's end the use of the R word, okay?
Sunday, September 11, 2011
9/11
I remember exactly what I was doing, where I was and what I was thinking/feeling on 9/11.
I was 18 years old, and I had spent the night at a former friend's house. I was crashing on the couch, and her dad just came in from his early morning job delivering news papers. I used the crash at their house a lot, so I was used to hearing her dad coming in at around 6am. Normally, I'd just ignore the noise he made and go back to sleep. On rare occasions I'd say a quick hello, ask him how his day was and then go back to sleep.
This time, it was different. He came in and immediately woke me up and said, "You need to turn on the TV. Now." I was stunned, but did as he said. I asked him if there was any channel in particular he wanted me to go to and he told me to turn it on to MSNBC. As I was still pushing away the cobwebs of sleep I was having a hard time really latching on to what was being talked about, but everyone was sounding very tense and worried. Then, I saw it. The backdrop to the coverage was a live image of the Twin Towers. On one of them was a huge plume of smoke.
"Is that....?" I asked.
"Yeah. A plane crashed into one of the Twin Towers. They think it was an accident, but they're not sure." the dad replies.
"When did this happen? Do they know who did it?" I'm completely glued to the TV at this point.
"It just happened. I heard about it on the radio as I was driving home. I don't think they know who did it, yet."
We sat there watching the news, quietly contemplating all the repercussions of this. How many people were hurt? What happened to the pilot? Was there something wrong with the plane? A thousand thoughts, feelings, concerns, questions were racing through my head and then the second plane hit. I couldn't believe it. Two planes?? Right then, I knew. Everything will be forever changed. In less than ten minutes, the way we look at the world won't ever be the same. There was no question any more. This was an attack.
What was really difficult for me was watching the anchor people really struggle with what they were seeing. I think Brian Williams was on that morning, along with another woman and they didn't have a clue of what to say. They were seeing this at the exact time we were, so they had no time to process what they were seeing. No time to compose themselves. No time to come to terms with the fact that one of their city's greatest landmarks was literally going up in smoke.
My friend woke up and came out of her room at this point. I can't remember who got her; it may have been me. I told her what had happened and it was around this point that we learned about the other planes going down in Pennsylvanian and the Pentagon. Everyone was quiet in the house. My friend's toddler son was up and being loud (as toddlers are wont to do) so she put him in their room to play with his toys as we all watched in horror. More and more footage was coming in, and more and more people were calling in. Experts, witnesses, politicians. All of them were trying to keep their cool as they were seeing what was happening.
Tunnels, bridges, borders, airports; everything was shutting down. America was locking it's doors.
It seemed like we were watching the news for days when, two hours after the first plane hit, the southern tower collapsed in itself. What was odd was the that people watching the coverage were aware of it before the anchor people. Tears came to my eyes as I watched, knowing that if someone survived that, it would be a miracle. As reports came in that the tower had indeed collapsed, the anchor people just couldn't believe what they were hearing and seeing. They kept asking the people who were reporting this if they meant something had fallen off the building, or if just a part of the building collapsed, and the people reporting would say, "No. The whole building has collapsed. There's nothing left. It's gone." You could hear them fight back tears as they were fighting to stay professional, trying not to incite fear or panic from their viewers.
September 11th has always had special meaning to me. My older brother's birthday was that day. One of my oldest friends birthday was that day also. I have always had a reason to celebrate and be thankful for September 11th. As I was watching New York go up in a plume of smoke, my thoughts went out to these two very important people in my life and about what was possibly going through their minds. Were they feeling guilty for celebrating their birthdays? Would they even want to celebrate it anymore? Would they feel like they shouldn't? I imagine I would be thinking along those lines if this happened on my birthday.
2,996 died as a result of the 9/11 attacks. 2,977 were innocent victims. The number of victims of the attacks perhaps cannot be counted. So many families are grieving the loss of their loved ones who died on that day. So many people who managed to survive the attacks will be forever haunted by what happened that day. So many people were injured that day, have suffered or perhaps are still suffering from survivor's guilt, post traumatic stress disorder. Many of those people will forever wear a scar on their bodies that mark that day. Dozens, if not hundreds, of firefighters, police officers, paramedics, doctors, nurses and other medical, emergency and military personnel have died or were injured as a result of trying to save as many people as they could from the attacks.
Children lost their parents. Parents lost their children.
Everyone around the world watched the day the world changed, just like I did.
*****Writer's Note*****
For many in BC, while this is a day for remembering, it's also a day of joy as a little boy was returned to his parent's loving arms. Kienan Hebert has been found! Sparwood RCMP received a call at around 2:00am this morning and were told that Kienan was brought back to his family home. The Heberts were staying at a friends' house down the road and they saw a large police presence in front of their house. They went over to their house to see what was going on and they saw Kienan, in the living room, holding his blankie.
The suspect, still believed to be Randall Hopley, is still at large so please keep your eyes out for him and let the police know if you spot him or his vehicle, a light brown 1987 Toyota Camry, BC License plate 098 RAL.
I was 18 years old, and I had spent the night at a former friend's house. I was crashing on the couch, and her dad just came in from his early morning job delivering news papers. I used the crash at their house a lot, so I was used to hearing her dad coming in at around 6am. Normally, I'd just ignore the noise he made and go back to sleep. On rare occasions I'd say a quick hello, ask him how his day was and then go back to sleep.
This time, it was different. He came in and immediately woke me up and said, "You need to turn on the TV. Now." I was stunned, but did as he said. I asked him if there was any channel in particular he wanted me to go to and he told me to turn it on to MSNBC. As I was still pushing away the cobwebs of sleep I was having a hard time really latching on to what was being talked about, but everyone was sounding very tense and worried. Then, I saw it. The backdrop to the coverage was a live image of the Twin Towers. On one of them was a huge plume of smoke.
"Is that....?" I asked.
"Yeah. A plane crashed into one of the Twin Towers. They think it was an accident, but they're not sure." the dad replies.
"When did this happen? Do they know who did it?" I'm completely glued to the TV at this point.
"It just happened. I heard about it on the radio as I was driving home. I don't think they know who did it, yet."
We sat there watching the news, quietly contemplating all the repercussions of this. How many people were hurt? What happened to the pilot? Was there something wrong with the plane? A thousand thoughts, feelings, concerns, questions were racing through my head and then the second plane hit. I couldn't believe it. Two planes?? Right then, I knew. Everything will be forever changed. In less than ten minutes, the way we look at the world won't ever be the same. There was no question any more. This was an attack.
What was really difficult for me was watching the anchor people really struggle with what they were seeing. I think Brian Williams was on that morning, along with another woman and they didn't have a clue of what to say. They were seeing this at the exact time we were, so they had no time to process what they were seeing. No time to compose themselves. No time to come to terms with the fact that one of their city's greatest landmarks was literally going up in smoke.
My friend woke up and came out of her room at this point. I can't remember who got her; it may have been me. I told her what had happened and it was around this point that we learned about the other planes going down in Pennsylvanian and the Pentagon. Everyone was quiet in the house. My friend's toddler son was up and being loud (as toddlers are wont to do) so she put him in their room to play with his toys as we all watched in horror. More and more footage was coming in, and more and more people were calling in. Experts, witnesses, politicians. All of them were trying to keep their cool as they were seeing what was happening.
Tunnels, bridges, borders, airports; everything was shutting down. America was locking it's doors.
It seemed like we were watching the news for days when, two hours after the first plane hit, the southern tower collapsed in itself. What was odd was the that people watching the coverage were aware of it before the anchor people. Tears came to my eyes as I watched, knowing that if someone survived that, it would be a miracle. As reports came in that the tower had indeed collapsed, the anchor people just couldn't believe what they were hearing and seeing. They kept asking the people who were reporting this if they meant something had fallen off the building, or if just a part of the building collapsed, and the people reporting would say, "No. The whole building has collapsed. There's nothing left. It's gone." You could hear them fight back tears as they were fighting to stay professional, trying not to incite fear or panic from their viewers.
September 11th has always had special meaning to me. My older brother's birthday was that day. One of my oldest friends birthday was that day also. I have always had a reason to celebrate and be thankful for September 11th. As I was watching New York go up in a plume of smoke, my thoughts went out to these two very important people in my life and about what was possibly going through their minds. Were they feeling guilty for celebrating their birthdays? Would they even want to celebrate it anymore? Would they feel like they shouldn't? I imagine I would be thinking along those lines if this happened on my birthday.
2,996 died as a result of the 9/11 attacks. 2,977 were innocent victims. The number of victims of the attacks perhaps cannot be counted. So many families are grieving the loss of their loved ones who died on that day. So many people who managed to survive the attacks will be forever haunted by what happened that day. So many people were injured that day, have suffered or perhaps are still suffering from survivor's guilt, post traumatic stress disorder. Many of those people will forever wear a scar on their bodies that mark that day. Dozens, if not hundreds, of firefighters, police officers, paramedics, doctors, nurses and other medical, emergency and military personnel have died or were injured as a result of trying to save as many people as they could from the attacks.
Children lost their parents. Parents lost their children.
Everyone around the world watched the day the world changed, just like I did.
*****Writer's Note*****
For many in BC, while this is a day for remembering, it's also a day of joy as a little boy was returned to his parent's loving arms. Kienan Hebert has been found! Sparwood RCMP received a call at around 2:00am this morning and were told that Kienan was brought back to his family home. The Heberts were staying at a friends' house down the road and they saw a large police presence in front of their house. They went over to their house to see what was going on and they saw Kienan, in the living room, holding his blankie.
The suspect, still believed to be Randall Hopley, is still at large so please keep your eyes out for him and let the police know if you spot him or his vehicle, a light brown 1987 Toyota Camry, BC License plate 098 RAL.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Kienan Hebert
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| Kienan Hebert - last seen wearing Scooby Doo boxer shorts |
RCMP suspect that a person (I won't call him a man) by the name of Randall Hopley is the one who took the child. They believe he is driving his light brown, 1987 Toyota Camry with a BC license plate 098 RAL. Randall Hopley is 46 year-old with a long history with the RCMP. In 2008, Hopley attempted to kidnap a special needs child from his foster home and return the child to his biological parents, for a fee of $2800. There wasn't enough evidence to convict him on the count of unlawful confinement and of abduction, but he did go to jail for 18 months for break and entry. Prior to that, he had 11 other break-in convictions as well as having been found guilt of a sexual assault in 1985. He looks like a real douche-bag and his rap sheet proves it.
A week ago, my partner wanted to surprise me with a morning/afternoon to myself by taking our child with him to the PNE. When either one of us leaves the house before the other wakes up (and it's something that wasn't discussed ahead of time), the standard operating procedure (SOP) is to write a note on a white board to let the other know where they've gone, if they took the kid with them and usually and ETA on their return home. For some reason, I didn't think to check the white board when I woke up. All I knew was I was awake and my child was no where to be seen. I called out his name, went throughout the house to look at all possible hiding spots, checked the front door (which was locked - dead bolt). He was no where. Irrationally, I thought maybe he was with my sister, so I called her to see if that was the case. She was the level headed one of the two of us and told me to call my partner. For some bizarre reason, I was holding off calling him because I didn't want to worry him on his day off. So here I am, in this gut wrenching panic, about to call the police to say someone stole my child and I call my partner. In tears, I ask if he has our kid and he seemed confused that I was as panicked as I was. He said, "Well, yeah I have him. Didn't you check the white board?" Sure enough, there was a note from him that he took our child with him to the Fair.
That was the single most terrifying moment of my life. I nearly died in a trucking accident 7 years ago, and the fear I felt in those few seconds from when I knew we were about to collide to when the collision occurred didn't even come close to the fear I felt when I thought (rather irrationally. Seriously, had I checked the white board, I wouldn't have had to feel that fear) that someone had my baby. I saw my life flash before my eyes, convinced I was going to die on that snowy highway, and I would rather go through that experience every day for the rest of my life than feel what it felt like when I thought someone had my kid for even one millisecond.
The thing is, I know - without a shadow of doubt - that what I felt can't even come close, can't even compare to what Kienan's mother, father and family are feeling right know. I felt as though someone had clawed my heart, my very soul, from my body with their bare hands and I know that while that feeling only lasted a few minutes, Kienan's mother is feeling it minute after minute. Hour after hour. Day after day. God, I can't even begin to imagine what it feels like to not only know that your baby is gone, that some evil person STOLE your little angel, but to know that that bastard took him from your very house! While you were there! Your house is the one place your child should always, ALWAYS feel safe. The person didn't just take their child; he took away their home. Their feeling of safety, of security, of comfort. He took away everything that that house is supposed to be to that family when he took their child.
My heart aches for Kienan and his family. There have been some possible sightings, in Kamloops, Dawson Creek, Chetwynd and on the ferry heading from Tsawwassen to Vancouver Island. Sadly, nothing has come from either of those sightings. I can't imagine how it feels to think that your child may be finally coming home only to have that too, ripped away from you.
In all of my melodramatic writing, I will say that I am really impressed with how the cities around them, around us all, seem to be responding. As soon as the Amber Alert came out, TransLink busses have been alerting riders that the alert is still in effect. SkyTrain stations are posting information about Kienan, Hopley and Hopley's vehicle. When the RCMP and BC Ferry found out that there was a possible sighting on one of the ferries, they immediately turned the ship around and brought it back to Tsawwassen. Alberta RCMP, and Canadian Border Services are on full alert. Even on Facebook and Twitter, everyone is sharing information, updates or simply wishing for the best possible outcome for the Hebert family.
If the Heberts somehow reads this post: I am so sorry that this is happening to you. I am fighting back tears as I write this because no one should have to feel the pain you are feeling right now. I imagine the only thing that can possibly the ache in your soul right is to have your son safely in your arms and I hope, with every fiber of my being that tonight is the last night that you will ever have to go to bed (if you are even able to sleep) wondering where your baby boy is.
If Hopley (or whomever has Kienan right now) reads this: bring that little boy back to where he belongs. Bring him back his family. You have brought so much pain to the Heberts, the people of Sparwood and all the communities - big or small - that have been hurting with and for the Heberts, to your mother. For once in your life, do something right and let that sweet little boy go home to his parents and siblings.
To everyone else reading this (especially those in BC, Alberta and Washington): it is the RCMP's belief that if they find the car belonging to Hopley, they'll find Hopley and they'll find Kienan. Please keep your eyes peeled for a light brown, 1987 Toyota Camry with a BC license plate 098 RAL. If you see this vehicle, don't be a hero! Don't be a vigilante! Get as good a look as you safely can and immediately call the police and let them know exactly where you saw the vehicle, exactly when, and exactly what it was doing (is the vehicle parked? Driving north towards Fort St. John? Is the driver driving erratically?) and by all means, KEEP YOURSELF SAFE!! You won't be helping anyone if you engage Hopley, least of all that little boy.
 |
| Randall Hopley, the person suspected of abducting Kienan Hebert. |
 . |
| Hopley drives a 1987 Toyota Camry, believed to look like this one. BC license plate is 098 RAL |
*****UPDATE 9.10.2011*****
- Please go to the Find Kienan Hebert page for important updates and information. When there, print out a photo of Kienan and post it around your neighbourhood with a yellow ribbon. There are vigils being held in communities all over BC and Alberta. If there's one in your area, please consider going.
- The Amber Alert has been officially extended to Alberta, Canada and Washington, USA.
- For the fourth day, 500 volunteers are actively searching for Kienan in and around Sparwood, including a search party headed by Sarah Gasparetto who is searching off the beaten path.
- Police confirm that there was an attempted abduction in Sparwood earlier on the day Kienan was taken.
- The follow quote is a message from Kienan's parents to the abductor:
"Speaking to whoever has Kienan right now. We are just asking please bring Kienan to a safe place right now. Okay. Like a gas station or a store parking lot where he is visibly seen and you can just drop him off there. Walk away. We just want him safe. Kienan is only three-years-old right now, and as you know and we know, Kienan can't speak. So he can't tell us who you are. This is your chance now to get away. All we want is Kienan to come back with us and to be safe in our arms again. Thank you,"
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
The evils of Wal-Mart
So yesterday, I posted a status on my Facebook. It was "Wal-Mart + Labour Day = Really Bad Idea!!" It was unbelievably busy there, yesterday! It was like it was Boxing Day there. Busier, in fact! Unfortunately it was unavoidable because I had a prescription that needed filling and Wal-Mart is the cheapest option. To the uninitiated, Facebook has this feature that will sometimes show you your status (or a friends' status) from exactly a year ago. I put that post up to A) Warn people to stay away from Wal-Mart that day, to save them a headache and B) To serve as a reminder in case I or my partner gets a thought to go to Wal-Mart next year on Labour Day to stay the hell away.
Turns out this status was incredibly controversial. A well meaning friend of mine took issue with the fact that we spend our money at a place like Wal-Mart. Other friends, and myself, defended our decisions to shop there. It wound up being rather heated, so I thought that maybe this is worth a blog post.
I don't think too many people actually like to shop at Wal-Mart. So often, I see friends posting on their Facebook that they have to go shopping at Wal-Mart and ask us to wish them luck. Alternatively, I will see posts where they returned from Wal-Mart and they're asking themselves (on Facebook) just what they were thinking going there. I imagine, if people actually enjoyed shopping at Wal-Mart, the website People of Wal-Mart wouldn't be nearly as popular. You don't see websites like People of Superstore, People of Sears, People of Zellers. Shopping at Wal-Mart carries a certain social stigma.
We all know, that Wal-Mart is more concerned with lining their coffers than they are with supporting fair trade, local businesses, ethical business practices. We all know this. The fact of the matter is: due to the current financial climate, aforementioned questionable/unethical business practices of big box stores, inability to work/find work, etc. many of us are in a position where we need to weigh our need to support our family and make every dollar stretch as far as possible with our need to stand on ethical/moral high ground. When you're living from paycheque to paycheque or worse, you can't afford to have morals. You're not proud of that, you don't say it out loud, but it's the truth.
In an ideal world, we'd be able to afford to shop locally. We'd buy our books from the small bookstores (and those bookstores would be able to stock the books that we wish to buy), we'd buy our clothes from local boutiques (and those boutiques would be able to sell clothes in all sizes), we'd buy our groceries from local grocery stores (and they'd be able to afford to stock the shelves with what we need/want at a competitive price, and we wouldn't have to go to one store to buy produce, another to buy meat, another to buy bread.. so on and so forth. I find it hard to argue the ethics of shopping locally, when you're driving from store to store to store wasting fuel and polluting the earth with the exhaust from your vehicle), and we'd be able to ALSO rail against big box stores' and their refusal of fair trade practices.
Having said that, when the choice is my child's well being or someone else's well being the decision will just about always be my child. Maybe, just maybe, choosing my child will enable him to grow up and go into a profession that provides him with the means and/or opportunity to defend those (possibly even those making wares for Wal-Mart and their ilk) who need defending.
I can live with that, and my child won't want for food, clothing and shelter.
Writer's Note:
I have attached links that provide those with the means to donate to organizations that focus on putting an end to child labour, articles about child labour, support fair trade practices, and a list of articles that list items made using fair trade practices. It's a short list so far but please, if you know of other links that will help educate consumers or aid in the fight for fair trade and a stop to forced/child labour let me know, and I will add it to the list.
UNICEF
Save the Children - India
FairTrade.net
Where to buy Fair Trade products
Turns out this status was incredibly controversial. A well meaning friend of mine took issue with the fact that we spend our money at a place like Wal-Mart. Other friends, and myself, defended our decisions to shop there. It wound up being rather heated, so I thought that maybe this is worth a blog post.
I don't think too many people actually like to shop at Wal-Mart. So often, I see friends posting on their Facebook that they have to go shopping at Wal-Mart and ask us to wish them luck. Alternatively, I will see posts where they returned from Wal-Mart and they're asking themselves (on Facebook) just what they were thinking going there. I imagine, if people actually enjoyed shopping at Wal-Mart, the website People of Wal-Mart wouldn't be nearly as popular. You don't see websites like People of Superstore, People of Sears, People of Zellers. Shopping at Wal-Mart carries a certain social stigma.
We all know, that Wal-Mart is more concerned with lining their coffers than they are with supporting fair trade, local businesses, ethical business practices. We all know this. The fact of the matter is: due to the current financial climate, aforementioned questionable/unethical business practices of big box stores, inability to work/find work, etc. many of us are in a position where we need to weigh our need to support our family and make every dollar stretch as far as possible with our need to stand on ethical/moral high ground. When you're living from paycheque to paycheque or worse, you can't afford to have morals. You're not proud of that, you don't say it out loud, but it's the truth.
In an ideal world, we'd be able to afford to shop locally. We'd buy our books from the small bookstores (and those bookstores would be able to stock the books that we wish to buy), we'd buy our clothes from local boutiques (and those boutiques would be able to sell clothes in all sizes), we'd buy our groceries from local grocery stores (and they'd be able to afford to stock the shelves with what we need/want at a competitive price, and we wouldn't have to go to one store to buy produce, another to buy meat, another to buy bread.. so on and so forth. I find it hard to argue the ethics of shopping locally, when you're driving from store to store to store wasting fuel and polluting the earth with the exhaust from your vehicle), and we'd be able to ALSO rail against big box stores' and their refusal of fair trade practices.
Having said that, when the choice is my child's well being or someone else's well being the decision will just about always be my child. Maybe, just maybe, choosing my child will enable him to grow up and go into a profession that provides him with the means and/or opportunity to defend those (possibly even those making wares for Wal-Mart and their ilk) who need defending.
I can live with that, and my child won't want for food, clothing and shelter.
Writer's Note:
I have attached links that provide those with the means to donate to organizations that focus on putting an end to child labour, articles about child labour, support fair trade practices, and a list of articles that list items made using fair trade practices. It's a short list so far but please, if you know of other links that will help educate consumers or aid in the fight for fair trade and a stop to forced/child labour let me know, and I will add it to the list.
UNICEF
Save the Children - India
FairTrade.net
Where to buy Fair Trade products
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Faith the "Warrior Princess"
Because I know this little girl is someone that is near and dear to some of my friends' hearts, I am going to dedicate this post to Faith, the Warrior Princess. What is written below is a summary of the difficult war she has been battling against cancer. I was going to say it's a brief summary, but there's no such thing as a "brief summary" when talking about one's battle with cancer. Some of it may be difficult to read, but imagine how difficult it is for this little girl and her family to have to live through it.
Faith was 7 years old on April 19th when she was diagnosed with Osteogenic Sarcoma in her left deltoid and shoulder. She started Chemo at Doernbecher Children's Hospital, but the chemo didn't work. The tumor grew and we were told her arm would need to be amputated. Two days before that was to occur, Dr. "Chappie" Conrad of Seattle Children's Hospital did a limb salvage surgery and saved her left arm from just above the elbow down through her hand. She has 'medical play-doh' for a left shoulder and a ceramic encased steel rod in her upper arm. She continued her chemo at Doernbecher until the protocol ended January 2011.
On April 15th, 2011, she was diagnosed with metastatic lung cancer, and had lung surgery on both May 3rd and May 23rd, 2011. At the beginning of July, 2011, her cancer again metastacised to her left lung - the upper lobe has a 4cm+ tumor in it that grew in 4 weeks and cannot be removed at this time, as it is wrapped around the pulmonary vessel.
We were flown to Doernbecher on Monday, July 18th, after a weekend in our local hospital, where it was discovered that she had a pleural effusion (liquid between the left lung and chest wall.) At Doernbecher, they began by draining 1/2 liter of fluid from her chest. She also had a mass on her jaw that it took several weeks to figure out - the final answer was Osteogenic Sarcoma in the soft tissue wrapped around her left mandible. She started a new chemo protocol for metastasis that has a published 30% response rate. She was also given 5 high doses of radiation, for palliative care, hoping to reduce her pain and possibly shrink the tumor. They again needed to drain her chest cavity that had built back up, this time taking 1.75 liters of fluid and leaving in a chest tube. After one round of chemo, and both the mass in her jaw and chest growing, we stopped the chemo as it obviously wasn't working. It's still undetermined whether or not the radiation worked. Her jaw and cheek are still extremely swollen at this point - the last radiation was Friday, August 5th.
We were told that at this point, because her cancer has been resistant to everything, the doctors they believe she has anywhere from 4-6 weeks left with us. They did discover a 'mutated gene' in the biopsy from her chest that has not been seen before (or not discovered) in Osteogenic Sarcoma patients. She would be eligible for a clinical trial 2-weeks after discontinuing radiation, if she is ambulatory and not oxygen dependent. This gene is one that is seen in adult lung cancer patients, but has not been tried on pediatric Osteo patients. Time and the good Lord will let us know if this is meant to be. We were told that this would not be a "cure" but if it worked at all, might just prolong the inevitable.
We were flown home today and Faith will be on hospice care until/unless we are led down a different path. We ask that you encourage, support and pray for our sweet Warrior Princess as she continues to battle for her life ♥
Here are some ways you can help:
- On Faith's Facebook page, Faith's Friends, there is a FundRazr tab. You can donate by PayPal directly through this page.
- My friend, owner/founder of Cathy's Creations has created some beautiful pieces of jewellery (a bracelet, a charm and a ring) for Faith's Friends. Proceeds of the jewellery goes to Faith's family to help with medical costs. She also has a lot of wonderful jewellery, some of it attached to a specific cause, and puts a lot of love into the pieces she makes.
- On Cathy's Creation's Facebook page, there will be an auction for a brand new HP Touchpad on August 27th, 2011. The auction will start at 9am EST and end at 3pm EST; starting bid is $150. She will post the same photo that day when the auction starts and all you have to do is place your bid under the photo. ALL proceeds from this auction will go directly to Faith's family. You get a shiny new toy, and you can know that the money you spent on it went to a good cause.
- The Dinner Roll is accepting contributions for Faith's family. When they are in need of a meal, they can call the Dinner Roll, order what they would like from 15 different local restaurants and have it delivered at no additional cost! You can contact The Dinner Roll at: 541-772-7655. The account name is Jolayne Fulmer. I think this is something people forget about all the time. The families are hit hard when they are faced with a battle against cancer, and something as simple as making a meal can sometimes be way too overwhelming.
- There is a Sensational Scentsy fundraiser, that you can be linked to through Facebook. The woman organizing it is donating 50% of her commission from August 15th, 2011 - September 2nd, 2011 to Faith's family to help with medical costs.
I know times are tough right now for a lot of people - believe me, I know! - so it may be really hard, if not impossible, to help out financially. Spreading the word however, is free. Forward this post to everyone you know who can help financially or who knows someone who can help.
Faith is a mover of mountains,
And there's nothing that God cannot do,
So start out today with Faith in your heart
And climb till your dream comes true!
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Today is my birthday
But I don't want to talk about that (though, thank you to everyone who took some time out of their day to wish me a happy birthday. That was incredibly touching!)
I want to, again, talk about the Mario Marathon. The event starts tomorrow at 11AM EST and already they have raisedalmost over $12,000 (update: as I was writing this post, they surpassed $12,000!). In fact, they've raised more than the grand total of the first ever Mario Marathon, and it hasn't even started yet! I don't know that I've ever gone into why I support the Mario Marathon so much. In my first post about the marathon, I touched on the viewer interactivity a bit, but today I want to expand on that a little more.
Over the years, my partner and I have become regular viewers of the marathon. Whenever they broadcast anything (such as testing the picture in picture, writing code for the Wheel of Awesome, practicing SMB3, or sewing Toad hats), we try to pop in to the social stream and watch what's going on and interact with the other viewers as well as with whomever is broadcasting at that time. Since there are a number of people who do the same, it's turned into quite an online community. There are a good number of people in the Mario Marathon who I consider a friend and there are often talks of meet-ups at some convention or another. As far as I know, a handful of these people have, in fact, met IRL.
In this community we support one another. There's a section on the Mario Marathon website that highlights partner sites (thanks to everyone for your generous donations and keeping me in the #1 spot! Let's see if we can keep it that way, hey?) and while there's some friendly competition going on between us, we still are super proud of each others accomplishments. One of the other top partner sites is GrubberGamer.com, and boy are they catching up to me fast!
GrubberGamer.com is a site that scours the internet for deals (either through online retailers, marketplaces and specialty stores) looking for the best video game deals and discounts. They have done a great job of finding a way for every day people who really love gaming but can't afford big box store prices to get the games they want without harming their wallet. If you're a gamer (or a gamer groupie, like I am), I encourage you to check out their website. It's run by amazing people (check them out on twitter, @GrubberGamer) who won't lead you astray in your affordable video game needs.
But donate through my blog to the Mario Marathon, mmkay? Consider it a birthday present.
I want to, again, talk about the Mario Marathon. The event starts tomorrow at 11AM EST and already they have raised
Over the years, my partner and I have become regular viewers of the marathon. Whenever they broadcast anything (such as testing the picture in picture, writing code for the Wheel of Awesome, practicing SMB3, or sewing Toad hats), we try to pop in to the social stream and watch what's going on and interact with the other viewers as well as with whomever is broadcasting at that time. Since there are a number of people who do the same, it's turned into quite an online community. There are a good number of people in the Mario Marathon who I consider a friend and there are often talks of meet-ups at some convention or another. As far as I know, a handful of these people have, in fact, met IRL.
In this community we support one another. There's a section on the Mario Marathon website that highlights partner sites (thanks to everyone for your generous donations and keeping me in the #1 spot! Let's see if we can keep it that way, hey?) and while there's some friendly competition going on between us, we still are super proud of each others accomplishments. One of the other top partner sites is GrubberGamer.com, and boy are they catching up to me fast!
GrubberGamer.com is a site that scours the internet for deals (either through online retailers, marketplaces and specialty stores) looking for the best video game deals and discounts. They have done a great job of finding a way for every day people who really love gaming but can't afford big box store prices to get the games they want without harming their wallet. If you're a gamer (or a gamer groupie, like I am), I encourage you to check out their website. It's run by amazing people (check them out on twitter, @GrubberGamer) who won't lead you astray in your affordable video game needs.
But donate through my blog to the Mario Marathon, mmkay? Consider it a birthday present.
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