So today the husband, the kid, and I went down stateside to hang out and do a bit of shopping. Before we started our shopping marathon, we decided to stop for lunch at Taco Time. Through a miscommunication, we wound up getting two extra tacos that none of us ended up having. We saved the tacos, figuring we could eat it later, or better yet, give it to someone who's hungry.
We went shopping at Ross for an hour or so, and then on our way back to the car, I notice a guy sitting in the parking lot under the blazing hot sun. I've seen him there before, and I've given him food each time I've seen him, since we always seem to have leftovers from some restaurant or another. Today was no exception.
Here's the crazy part: When I gave him the food, his reaction was, "Are you sure you can afford this? Thank you! Are you sure?" This guy, a Navy vet (according to his sign), is hungry, homeless, sitting under the blazing sun, and his primary concern was making sure *I* wasn't going to go hungry or put myself out by giving him this food. Let's be real here - if I didn't give this guy our food, I was going to turf it. And this guy was worried... for *me*. After I just spent $70 on clothes that I didn't *really* need. I was so moved I started to cry.
We often forget how incredibly rich we are. We take our three squares a day, our overabundance of snacks, our drinks at the bar, all of that stuff for granted. We gorge ourselves on Ben and Jerry's and then complain... we complain about how full we are! We whine about being fat. We joke about how this bottle of wine is going to cost us a couple of hours at the gym. Then when some person who's obviously living on the streets has the temerity to ask us for the spare change in our pockets so they can get something to eat, we lie that we don't have any. Or that we can't spare any.
This is a lie. Most of us probably don't have the resources to do what FouseyTube, MagicofRahat, or Sofia's Angels do. But that doesn't mean we can't do something.
I'm going to try to do something.
(PS: Sorry if the post ended somewhat abruptly. It started to sound a bit preachy. I didn't like that, and it's late. So I ended it where I did.)
Sunday, August 3, 2014
Thursday, May 1, 2014
I miss her
I’ve been wanting to write a post about religion, and the absence of it in my life. This is my third attempt. I can’t put into words how I feel. I don’t believe in God. I used to. I’ve been hurt by religion. I walked away and haven’t looked back. It’s not as simple as that, but maybe that’s all I need to say about that.
The reason I’ve been struggling with this post for the past week and a half is because today is the 8th anniversary of my friend’s suicide. It’s such a weird time of year for me, since Mini Moo’s birthday falls less than a week prior to that. So there’s this huge build up to the kid’s birthday; days, weeks, months of planning the party (I went a bit nuts this year) and what gifts to get and an almost immediate crash into missing my friend even more than normal.
This year it’s even harder for me. I know someone who’s struggling with suicide. I don’t know this person well, but someone who’s really important to me knows this person really well. He’s a young person who doesn’t fully realize the impact suicide has on the people left behind. I miss my friend all the time. There are times where it’s so bad, I can’t function properly. There are times I’m so angry at her that I want to punch things, throw things, destroy things. I can’t yell at her, so what other option do I have? Most of all, I miss talking to her.
She was funny, so smart, loved animals, being active, and being with her friends. She adored her family. She had her own business. She was a light. She struggled with depression and thoughts of suicide. She had a hard time finding her own identity. She believed in God, but had a lot of questions that couldn’t be answered.
And now she’s gone.
We can’t ever talk to her over the phone. We can’t post stupid quizzes on her Facebook wall and find out what flower she is (she’d be a green tulip). Her family can’t hug her. Her pain made her blind to all the amazing things she brought to this world, and she took that from us. I’ll love her forever, and I’ll never stop mourning her death. But I don’t think I’ll ever forgive her for that moment of selfishness.
I wish I could grab this kid by the shoulders and say, “Don’t you dare!! Don’t you dare deprive the world of all you have to offer! Don’t you dare leave a hole in the hearts of your family and friends that will never be filled!” I have talked to him about how suicide has impacted me and my friends. One of my best friends has also talked to him about her own experiences with suicide. He listens to us, and all the people who are trying to help him, but I worry he doesn’t hear us.
Like with my friend, he can’t see past the wall of pain. All he knows is that living... that taking that next breath... is just too hard. He’s convinced that people won’t give a shit if he lives or dies. He thinks those who love him will move on in no time, and things will be better for everyone around him.
Unfortunately when someone’s in such a dark hole, there’s little that can be said to that person to convince them otherwise. All we can do is love them, give them as much support and encouragement as we can, and try to show them how our lives are so much richer with them in it. My life will never be the same without my friend in it. The same is true for her family and friends. The same would be true if this kid does the unthinkable. Many lives will be profoundly impacted by his loss. I just hope he realizes this before it’s too late.
If you’re in a scary place, please know that you’re not alone. There are people who are there to help you. If you feel you can’t talk to your family and friends, there are help lines you can call. You can go to the hospital. You can call the police. You can talk to a teacher or counselor at school. Please don’t convince yourself that no one will help and please don’t stop asking for help. There will be someone who can help.
If you are thinking of hurting yourself, please call someone for help.
If you suspect someone around you may be suicidal and you don’t know what to do, please call someone for help.
Below is a list of resources that you can use for help.
List of suicide crisis lines by country
-------------------------------
If your country isn’t listed, and you would like me to include them on my list, please leave a comment below and I will do what I can to include a national number or resource on this post.
Someone loves you. Even if it’s someone you don’t know or haven’t met yet. Trust me in this.
I love you.
The reason I’ve been struggling with this post for the past week and a half is because today is the 8th anniversary of my friend’s suicide. It’s such a weird time of year for me, since Mini Moo’s birthday falls less than a week prior to that. So there’s this huge build up to the kid’s birthday; days, weeks, months of planning the party (I went a bit nuts this year) and what gifts to get and an almost immediate crash into missing my friend even more than normal.
This year it’s even harder for me. I know someone who’s struggling with suicide. I don’t know this person well, but someone who’s really important to me knows this person really well. He’s a young person who doesn’t fully realize the impact suicide has on the people left behind. I miss my friend all the time. There are times where it’s so bad, I can’t function properly. There are times I’m so angry at her that I want to punch things, throw things, destroy things. I can’t yell at her, so what other option do I have? Most of all, I miss talking to her.
She was funny, so smart, loved animals, being active, and being with her friends. She adored her family. She had her own business. She was a light. She struggled with depression and thoughts of suicide. She had a hard time finding her own identity. She believed in God, but had a lot of questions that couldn’t be answered.
And now she’s gone.
We can’t ever talk to her over the phone. We can’t post stupid quizzes on her Facebook wall and find out what flower she is (she’d be a green tulip). Her family can’t hug her. Her pain made her blind to all the amazing things she brought to this world, and she took that from us. I’ll love her forever, and I’ll never stop mourning her death. But I don’t think I’ll ever forgive her for that moment of selfishness.
I wish I could grab this kid by the shoulders and say, “Don’t you dare!! Don’t you dare deprive the world of all you have to offer! Don’t you dare leave a hole in the hearts of your family and friends that will never be filled!” I have talked to him about how suicide has impacted me and my friends. One of my best friends has also talked to him about her own experiences with suicide. He listens to us, and all the people who are trying to help him, but I worry he doesn’t hear us.
Like with my friend, he can’t see past the wall of pain. All he knows is that living... that taking that next breath... is just too hard. He’s convinced that people won’t give a shit if he lives or dies. He thinks those who love him will move on in no time, and things will be better for everyone around him.
Unfortunately when someone’s in such a dark hole, there’s little that can be said to that person to convince them otherwise. All we can do is love them, give them as much support and encouragement as we can, and try to show them how our lives are so much richer with them in it. My life will never be the same without my friend in it. The same is true for her family and friends. The same would be true if this kid does the unthinkable. Many lives will be profoundly impacted by his loss. I just hope he realizes this before it’s too late.
If you’re in a scary place, please know that you’re not alone. There are people who are there to help you. If you feel you can’t talk to your family and friends, there are help lines you can call. You can go to the hospital. You can call the police. You can talk to a teacher or counselor at school. Please don’t convince yourself that no one will help and please don’t stop asking for help. There will be someone who can help.
If you are thinking of hurting yourself, please call someone for help.
If you suspect someone around you may be suicidal and you don’t know what to do, please call someone for help.
Below is a list of resources that you can use for help.
Kids Help Phone (Canada)
Papyrus
(UK)
Samaritans
(UK)
-------------------------------
For resources close to you, wherever you are in Canada click hereList of suicide crisis lines by country
-------------------------------
If your country isn’t listed, and you would like me to include them on my list, please leave a comment below and I will do what I can to include a national number or resource on this post.
Someone loves you. Even if it’s someone you don’t know or haven’t met yet. Trust me in this.
I love you.
Monday, July 15, 2013
White Privilege
The evening of the George Zimmerman not guilty (*cough*bullspit*cough*) verdict was passed down, I saw this status on Facebook.
This is the reality of 2013 - still. And the thing is, this isn't something we can claim is an American problem. This is as much an issue in Canada, and the people who get the crap end of the stick in the want of racial equality are First Nations. One really solid indicator of this is the prison population.
In Canada, aboriginals make up about four per cent of the general Canadian population, yet make up 23 per cent of the prison population. Racial over-representation in the prison system is equally as horrid in the United States. According to the US Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) non-Hispanic blacks accounted for 39.4% of the total prison and jail population in 2009. According to the 2010 census of the US Census Bureau blacks (including Hispanic blacks) comprised 13.6% of the US population. In this infographic you can see how the system is really built to favour the white population in the US and while there isn't a well laid out (if poorly proof-read) infographic to show it, the same is true for the Canadian penal system.
For years, I've been really guilty of thinking, "well, I'm not a racist. I value all races equally so this racism thing everyone talks about is a problem, but it's not a problem in my life." Sure, I'd get upset when I see evidence/footage of inequality but by and large, I was indifferent to it. Not with any malice aforethought, I just was. I think an overwhelming, well-meaning majority of us have been/are. It seems like such a huge issue, while at the same time, such an old issue. I mean, Martin Luther King Jr. gave that epic speech, and the States has a black president who's serving his second term, right? What's left to be done?
There's a lot to be done. Exactly what, and how - I have no clue. I have to hope that not being blinded about being "colourblind" is at least a start. There is no post-racial America. If you still have to say "port-racism America" then it's not. Nor is that the case in Canada.
If you're still reading this (thanks!) and you come from a European background and live in North America, think about the fact that you and I have never had to encounter the same levels of racism as others have. We may have experienced moments here and there, but it's not a systemic occurrence. We haven't had to be trained not to trust police, to not speak about cultural events, or wear certain clothing.
We shouldn't feel guilty about being white, but we should be aware of this, be aware of how utterly unfair this is, and be aware that if we want equality for everyone, we need to start saying that this isn't okay. For decades, we've stood by and watched as Blacks, Natives, and Hispanics have fought for equal treatment and we've felt good about ourselves because we agreed with their point of view.
It's not enough anymore.
I haven't been able to not think about this since I read it. This is something Mini-Moo won't ever have to worry about, and that depresses me. Not because my son won't ever have to worry about wearing a hoody out in public, or worry about his name sounding too "ethnic" (*cough*bullspit*cough*) to get a job and therefore adopting an "employable" nickname (read: "White" name), or worry about being pulled over for speeding and making sure he behaves in such a way the police won't misinterpret his actions as aggressive. It depresses me because other parents have to train their kids to worry about this stuff.
This is the reality of 2013 - still. And the thing is, this isn't something we can claim is an American problem. This is as much an issue in Canada, and the people who get the crap end of the stick in the want of racial equality are First Nations. One really solid indicator of this is the prison population.
In Canada, aboriginals make up about four per cent of the general Canadian population, yet make up 23 per cent of the prison population. Racial over-representation in the prison system is equally as horrid in the United States. According to the US Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) non-Hispanic blacks accounted for 39.4% of the total prison and jail population in 2009. According to the 2010 census of the US Census Bureau blacks (including Hispanic blacks) comprised 13.6% of the US population. In this infographic you can see how the system is really built to favour the white population in the US and while there isn't a well laid out (if poorly proof-read) infographic to show it, the same is true for the Canadian penal system.
For years, I've been really guilty of thinking, "well, I'm not a racist. I value all races equally so this racism thing everyone talks about is a problem, but it's not a problem in my life." Sure, I'd get upset when I see evidence/footage of inequality but by and large, I was indifferent to it. Not with any malice aforethought, I just was. I think an overwhelming, well-meaning majority of us have been/are. It seems like such a huge issue, while at the same time, such an old issue. I mean, Martin Luther King Jr. gave that epic speech, and the States has a black president who's serving his second term, right? What's left to be done?
There's a lot to be done. Exactly what, and how - I have no clue. I have to hope that not being blinded about being "colourblind" is at least a start. There is no post-racial America. If you still have to say "port-racism America" then it's not. Nor is that the case in Canada.
If you're still reading this (thanks!) and you come from a European background and live in North America, think about the fact that you and I have never had to encounter the same levels of racism as others have. We may have experienced moments here and there, but it's not a systemic occurrence. We haven't had to be trained not to trust police, to not speak about cultural events, or wear certain clothing.
We shouldn't feel guilty about being white, but we should be aware of this, be aware of how utterly unfair this is, and be aware that if we want equality for everyone, we need to start saying that this isn't okay. For decades, we've stood by and watched as Blacks, Natives, and Hispanics have fought for equal treatment and we've felt good about ourselves because we agreed with their point of view.
It's not enough anymore.
Friday, June 28, 2013
Taco Stuffed Pasta Shells
I got this
recipe from SAOrganics.com. You can make this as mild or as flavourful
(read: spicy) as you like. We tend to
like things on the milder side, so I reduced the amount of the dry taco
seasoning, and used mild salsa and taco sauce). My guys are picky eaters, and both (especially Mini-Moo!) really liked this dish.
I'm definitely making this one again! I promised some friends the recipe, so without further ado, here it is. My notes are in Italics.
 |
| I forgot to take a picture of the dish, so I used the photo from momsownwords.com |
1 lb. ground beef or turkey (I used ground chicken – because I’m a rebel
like that)
1/4 cup taco seasoning, 1 envelope (we’re sissies, so I just used a bit of the seasoning – this is really according to taste)
4 oz. cream cheese, cubed (or scooped or whatever...who has time to cube?)
12 Jumbo Pasta shells, cooked according to package instructions (I just used the entire box of jumbo shells. It effectively more than doubles the recipe, but I think there was just too much filling for just 12 shells)
1 cup salsa
1 cup taco sauce*
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 cup shredded Jack cheese (I didn’t have any Jack cheese. Just use whatever the heck cheese you want; we used marble. You can make this recipe over and over again – and depending on what cheeses you use, it can really change the dish.)
1/4 cup taco seasoning, 1 envelope (we’re sissies, so I just used a bit of the seasoning – this is really according to taste)
4 oz. cream cheese, cubed (or scooped or whatever...who has time to cube?)
12 Jumbo Pasta shells, cooked according to package instructions (I just used the entire box of jumbo shells. It effectively more than doubles the recipe, but I think there was just too much filling for just 12 shells)
1 cup salsa
1 cup taco sauce*
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 cup shredded Jack cheese (I didn’t have any Jack cheese. Just use whatever the heck cheese you want; we used marble. You can make this recipe over and over again – and depending on what cheeses you use, it can really change the dish.)
1
can tomato sauce. (I added this because
I wanted it to be a pasta dish with a Tex-Mex flavour, not a Tex-Mex made with
pasta)
Optional Toppings: ( I totally didn’t see this!!)
1 1/2 cup crushed tortilla chips
1 cup sour cream
3 green onions, chopped
sliced olives
guacamole
sliced avocados
tomatoes
Directions
1. In a skillet brown meat over
medium heat. Add taco seasoning (* I
added the taco sauce in this step) and mix to combine. Add cubed cream
cheese, cover and simmer so cream cheese can melt. Remove from heat and cool.
2. Fill cooked shells with about
1-2 T. of meat mixture (I used about ¾ tbsp
per shell). In a 9×13 glass baking dish pour salsa to coat the bottom of
dish. Place filled taco shells on top then add taco sauce tomato sauce.
Cover and bake @ 350 for 30 minutes. Remove from oven, uncover, and sprinkle
cheese on top, return to oven for another 15 minutes or until cheese is melted
and bubbly. Serve with sour cream, and toppings of your choice.
3. Enjoy!
Monday, June 24, 2013
Why Torts will be awesome for Vancouver
Those of you who are avid hockey fans know of Tortorella's, um, tenuous relationship with reporters... or fans... or his players (see here, or here, or here, or here). He's not known for subscribing to Thumper's mother's philosophy of, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." and this leads me to the three reasons why I think he'll be great for the Vancouver organization. Despite these reasons being numbered, they are listed in no particular order.
#1. He's going to keep the Vancouver sports reporters in line.
For years now, I think our local reports have received some special treatment (or think they're entitled to special treatment) by the players, the coaching staff, and the franchise as a whole. Recently, the hubs came up with a phrase: "Can you get this knife out of my back? I need it for something else." This seems to sum up the relationship the Vancouver organization has with the reporters here. As a fan, it seems as though the franchise gives the reporters far more access than any other franchise gives their local reporters. Now, I don't think this entitles the franchise to receive rose-coloured reporting, but Botchford and the like often seem to forget that they have it pretty easy with the Vancouver Canucks organization. I imagine it wouldn't be that way in any other market.
Tortorella will probably have a lot of fun reminding our reporters what it's like in most other markets, and I will have a lot more fun watching this happen. He'll have them whipped in shape in no time.
#2. He's going to keep the Vancouver fans in line.
Vancouver NHL fans are known for being band wagon fans. If you google "vancouver bandwagoners" you'll see blog entry after blog entry, and news article after news article detailing just how notorious we are for hopping on and off the bandwagon. Remember that phrase the hubs came up with? Yeah, that applies to Vancouver Canucks and their relationship with us fans. When we're winning, all we can holler about is how this year is our year (2013/14 season is TOTALLY our year. I can feel it!). The minutes we lose a game... scratch that, the second we miss a shot, we all scream from the mountain tops (and we have a lot here) about how we knew that was a bogus trade deal; how he's not won a face off in 10 games; how, if we'd kept the last guy with the softest hands in the league, that puck most definitely would have found the back of the net.
Torts won't put up with that mess. He will call us out on that, and have fun doing it. He'll have us whipped into shape in no time.
#3. He's going to keep the Vancouver players in line.
As with every franchise, we have some prima donnas on our team. We have The Twins who can only pass to each other (amazing passes though they sometimes are), Kesler who seems to be made of glass, and Bieska who talks too much (I adore him, but seriously, the man jaws himself into the sin bin far too many time) to name a few players who have probably been treated with kid gloves (especially The Twins, I bet). Bieska stating that they don't need someone to crack the whip tells me that that's exactly what the team needs. GM Mike Gillis probably recognized this as well I bet is the very reason he courted Torts.
Vancouver players are treated well. They have some ground breaking fitness and training philosophies; they really get down to the science of fitness and nutrition with the players, and tailor a regimen to suit each individual players needs. They have a support staff that I doubt can be rivaled by any other team in the league (save perhaps some of the Original Six teams... but even then, I'm not too sure). They live in the most beautiful city in the world. Life is good, if you're in the NHL and you're playing for Vancouver. Sure, you'll get swept out of the playoffs one season, and then get frustratingly close to the Cup in subsequent seasons, but you're living the good life here. With that, however, comes complacency. This is where Torts comes in. He's going to make some players very non-complacent. He'll have them whipped into shape in no time.
I know there are a number of sport journalists, fans, and players who aren't too comfortable with this new development, but I know one player and one fan who can't wait.
This is going to be an awesome season.
Sunday, June 23, 2013
Oh em gee, another contest!
Happy Sunday, folks!
I know I've been beating you over the head with my support of the Mario Marathon, but I'm going to continue to do this today (you'll get a break soon, don't worry *wink*).
For the remainder of the day, every donation to the Mario Marathon through my blog gets you an entry to win a set of six Mario themed pot holders, handmade by my friend @missindyjones! Not only that, but if you donate a minimum $5 you'll also get entered to win a Wii U in the grand prize drawing from the folks at Mario Marathon!
Five dollars for a chance to win six handmade potholder AND a WiiU?? That's a pretty fantastic deal, if you ask me!
Send a screen grab of your donation (should look something like the pic below) to runningwithdithers@outlook.com and you'll be entered to win!
Good luck everyone!
I know I've been beating you over the head with my support of the Mario Marathon, but I'm going to continue to do this today (you'll get a break soon, don't worry *wink*).
For the remainder of the day, every donation to the Mario Marathon through my blog gets you an entry to win a set of six Mario themed pot holders, handmade by my friend @missindyjones! Not only that, but if you donate a minimum $5 you'll also get entered to win a Wii U in the grand prize drawing from the folks at Mario Marathon!
Five dollars for a chance to win six handmade potholder AND a WiiU?? That's a pretty fantastic deal, if you ask me!
Send a screen grab of your donation (should look something like the pic below) to runningwithdithers@outlook.com and you'll be entered to win!
Good luck everyone!
Friday, June 21, 2013
Contest Time!
Hello friends!
So I'm going to be running at least one or two contests over the next few days to promote the Mario Marathon.
The first contest is Perler Portrait!
Every $10 donated via my blog (using the donate button to the right) before June 21, 2013, 9:00 PM (PST) gets you one entry to win a custom made Perler portrait. Email a screen grab of your donation to runningwithdithers@outlook.com and you'll be added to the draw.
The winner will be announced on this blog and will need to email their photo so that I can pixelate it and turn it into Perler awesomeness. It will take a couple of weeks to make it (need to make sure I have the right amount of the right coloured beads), but I'll get it out to you ASAP.
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