Is Visiting Your Family Taxing?

Today I was going to post about my fiancé again.  He’s been such a rock for me these past three plus months, even more than usual, so I wanted to go on at great length how amazing he is.  I’ve been inspired to write about something else, so you’re just going to have to take my word for it, or read the last post I wrote about him instead.

A friend has a father that’s currently in the hospital.  Naturally, she wants to spend as much time as she can with her father while he’s there.  The problem is, whenever she does, she has to pay out the nose for parking.  I just looked it up.  For her city’s major hospital, which is where he’s staying, she has to pay $15 for parking because she has the nerve, the unmitigated gall to go see her father while he’s in the hospital.  Who the hell does she think she is?  Yeah, she can get it validated (the website says that that’s only for patients of visitors.  Umm.. . aside from hospital staff who probably have staff parking, who else is going to the hospital??  A door-to-door salesperson? Jehovah’s Witnesses?) , but she’s still paying a minimum of $6 to visit her childrens’ papou.

The thing is, it’s not exactly like this is an uncommon occurrence.  When I had to go get some paperwork straightened up when I first went on disability assistance last year, I had to pay $3 for less than 15 minutes worth of parking, because the government facility that I had to go to had pay parking, and because you couldn’t pay for a portion of the hour.  I was applying for financial aid and I had, essentially, had to pay to do so.  When I had my son, and we were discharged, we had to pay to leave the hospital because my mother dared to pick me up in her car (nevermind the fact that they will not allow you to leave the hospital in anything other than a car or ambulance) and there again was pay parking.

Does anyone else find it absolutely abhorrent that many hospitals and government facilities have pay parking?  These are essential service buildings, and all the taxes we pay throughout the year aren’t enough for these facilities aren’t enough.  No.  They need to add yet another tax for the luxury of going to these buildings.

One could argue that you don’t need to drive to these facilities.  You could take the bus (bus fares), the taxi (taxi rates) or an ambulance (in BC, we have to pay for an ambulance ride.  Tommy Douglas is probably rolling in his grave) instead; but unless you’re within walking distance of these facilities, and you are capable to walking there on your own two feet, or have someone who can push/carry/drag you all the way there, you’re somehow paying for it. 

I don’t what can/should be done about this, but it definitely makes me want to watch Sicko again. 

Sigh.

Handicapped Parking Spots

I currently am living with a disability.  I can't walk more than a few feet without the assistance of a cane and haven't been able to work for three months as a direct result of this (hopefully temporary!!) disability.  Because of this, I have a temporary handicapped decal.  For me, walking more than 100 meters[i] is like asking a fit person to do the West Coast Trail, just to go to the grocery store.  And I have a disability that still enables me to stand on my own volition or have complete control over my limbs.  Can you imagine how difficult it is for people who are forever bound to a wheelchair?  How difficult it is for people who can’t even operate the wheelchair on their own? 

When I see people who park in a designated handicap parking spot who do not have a decal, I get angry; even before I had need of a decal myself.  What on earth gave you such an inflated sense of entitlement that you feel that it is your right to take away the parking spot that has been specifically designated for people who have a physical disability that makes it difficult (or even impossible) for them to walk more than 100 meters?  Oh you only need to pop in and out of the bank?  So what??! Maybe I need to pop in and out of the bank, too, you jack-ass! 

Yesterday I had to go to a physio appointment and I was running a teeny bit late.  I wasn’t too terribly concerned about it because kitty corner from the clinic is a metered handicap parking spot.  I got there, and there was this red 2006 BMW M3 parked in the spot.  After my split second appreciation of such a fine machine (it’s one of my favourite cars), I realized that the turdnozzle[ii] didn’t have a decal!  So here I am, forced to have to search for another parking spot further away, causing me to have to walk further to get to my appointment.  As I mentioned at the top of this post, I can’t walk without a cane and have difficulty[iii] walking more than 100 meters.  If I walk up or down a slope, this makes matters worse. 

Now, in fairness to this person, they didn’t know that I have this disability, but that’s not the point of the matter.  Because of his[iv] (assumed) inflated sense of self worth, he felt as though he were more entitled to the spot than I or someone else with a disability.  Because he felt as though his convenience was of greater importance than my (or someone else’s) disability, I was in greater pain than I was throughout the entire day because I had to walk that much further and up a hill. 

Again, in fairness, it is safe to assume that had he not stolen that spot, someone else who was entitled to that spot would have taken it before I would get a chance to so I would have been in the same situation as I was in, but then I wouldn’t have burned with the feeling of social indignation and I wouldn’t have felt inspired (yet) to write this post and more poor readers would have suffered too!  (Now who has the inflated sense of self-importance?)

Even before my injury, I hated seeing this and I would often call either the towing company that managed the private lot, or I would call the city’s parking enforcement department (if I was in Vancouver).  Since I’ve established precedent of doing this when perfectly abled, you’d better damn well believe I’m going to call now that I’m not.  It turns out the jerkburger is a diplomat or consulate employee.  A-ha! We have discovered where he got his sense of self-importance.  The laws and rules don’t apply to diplomats.[v]

Well, since this snotnose not only parked in a designated handicap parking spot without a decal and let his meter expire (it was expired before my appointment), he got towed (at least that was what I was led to believe).  Ha!  The city may not be able to make the parking violations stick, but he still will have to deal with the inconvenience of going to the impound lot to pick up his car.  That’ll teach him. 

So be warned: If I see you parked in a handicap decal, be prepared to pay!  I more than likely will call a towing company or the city[vi] and you will have to pay.  If you’re lucky, all I’ll do is call you an asshole. 

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[i] One of the criteria for a handicap parking permit in BC is your inability to walk more than 100 meters.

[ii] I may be immature using less than kind words about this person, but I don’t think this calls for civility.  I don’t intend to curse at someone for doing this, but I certainly won’t be kind.

[iii] Difficulty = Can’t! Not without lots of pain and lots of pain meds afterwards.

[iv] I’m going to be using masculine pronouns from now on as shorthand.

[v] A bunch of hogwash, if you ask me! 

[vi] If you live in the City of Vancouver (in Canada), and you want to get a hold of parking enforcement, call 311 and ask for that department.

Don't even know where to begin

I've been off work for almost two months now with a hip injury that makes it nearly impossible for me to sit for any real stretch of time without pain.  Having an office job, this makes working pretty darned difficult right now.  As a result, my partner has really taken up the slack around the house.

He gets our son ready for bed every night.
He gets the boy in and out of the car, to and from daycare.
When the kid wakes up in the middle of the night, my guy jumps out of bed to comfort him.
He's making dinner every night, and if he's just too bushed to consider dinner, he's picking up the tab for takeout.
He bought me a bed tray so that I can comfortably eat in bed.
He's washing my laundry.
He's comforting me when I get so stressed out and frustrated at my inability to do much.
He stops whatever he's in the middle of doing, just to see if I need anything. 
He'll take the kid out for the day, all day - on his days off - just so I can have some quiet time, and so the kid doesn't feel cooped in.

He's doing all this - and so much more - so that I can recover that much quicker and because he loves me.  He is truly what a partner should be.  Father's Day is coming up and while I already have a gift for him lined up, whatever I get him won't even come close to making up for all that he's done for me and our son.  There isn't any way I can truly put to words the love and gratitude I have for him.  He's done so much for us, not just these past several weeks, but for years.  How do you thank someone for their constant, unwavering support and affection?  Something tells me that a tie simply won't do. 

To my partner, today I say: Thank you for being the amazing man that you are.  You are my rock.  I would be absolutely and wholly lost without you.  Not just because I'm laid up, but because you give me a reason to want to get up.

To his mother, today I say: Thank you for having him.  You should be so proud of your son.  It wasn't easy, with the cards you were dealt but you did a terrific job!

To our son, today I say: Thank you for giving me a piece of your father, for all days.  When you grow up, and want to know what it means to be a man, just look at your father.  He is kind, supportive, intelligent, self-assured, respectful and strong*.  He is dedicated to the people and things that matter to him, and when he says he's going to do something, you know it will get done.  You are very lucky to have him as your daddy!  No one will do more for you than him.

Writer's Note: I'm talking emotionally, as I don't believe being physically strong defines a man... though he is